There are a lot of people working very hard and still not getting anywhere. They’re spinning but not moving. Sound familiar? In this week’s video, I’ll speak to that struggle with three key points:
- Stretching yourself too thin (what it means, and what to do about it)
- Clarity and an exercise to get some of it
- Conviction and what it can do when you trust it.
If you enjoyed this video, have comments or questions, or have a request for next week’s video, please leave a comment below!
Peace, Love, and a million successes to you,
Please share your thoughts. What are you saying yes to these days? What would you like to say yes to?
If you like this video, please share it!
Thanks! Stay brilliant!
It’s been quite a crazy week! I’ve been sending out newsletters a few times a week since this started, and last week I threw out a challenge that came back to me like a wrecking ball. I invited all of you to revisit an old idea you had – maybe one you threw on the “back burner” quite some time ago. I didn’t challenge you to bring it to fruition that day, but I opened the door Monday, and challenged you to take some steps to see if it could hold water on Friday.
I received a lot of responses, filling my inbox throughout the day, and I cannot express how amazing it is to hear some of your ideas! Some of them felt so strong – like they have been burning the midnight oil inside you for years, and the passion and excitement of bringing it out was incredible to witness!
Monday I thought about the charity/foundation I wanted to start “eventually” – eventually is code for a magical time called “someday.” I opened my intention up for suggestion, and asked for a hint – what some of us call quantum flirts or signs. Well, I got it. There was so much going on in my world that day, that I almost felt like we had missed the reasons why we were living. Then a Trevor Project commercial came on. I immediately heard the voice in my head screaming at me.
We need to Nourish What Matters most in life.
That was it. I knew this was what had been burning inside me. So I did what any other completely neurotic nerd with a good idea does: I got on the computer, registered a domain name, built a quick website, created logos, a mini mission statement, and designed merchandise to get started.
Nourish What Matters
Many of you received the newsletter this morning regarding it, but I’m going to throw in some details here as well. Nourish What Matters is an ideal, a foundation – nay, a movement in the making. It’s about recognizing the value and preciousness of life, and the community and connectedness of humans. We’re all different, but we’re all here for the same thing: to experience whatever greatness we can while we can.
Nourish What Matters is about acknowledging that ideal in everyone, and giving them a place to call home. We will raise monies for various events and charities until we have our own charity to tout. We want to support the Trevor Project, Sing for Hope, and organizations that promote the human spirit and innovation.
You can join the movement, and get the donations started by clicking the image above, or this link, and purchasing a t-shirt or hoodie. You know you want to. They’re wicked-awesome, and so are you… isn’t that a perfect match? I vote yes.
Please purchase a piece of merch, and spread the word!
Together we can do this!
Peace, Love, and a million successes to you all!
P.S. What charities do you want us to donate to? What causes speak most to you? Let us know in the comments below!
Holy Mother of God, it’s actually happening. I’m turning 30 in a little over 30 days. I haven’t burned the city down, and I haven’t been elected Presidente del Mundo. So, what have I done? Is it enough? Have I struck out more than I’ve home-runned? What am I missing?!?!
The past few weeks I’ve been toying with the idea of actually turning 30 – like it wasn’t actually happening to me. Suddenly, I felt the impact of this transition during my morning protein shake:
I am a month from closing my twenties… FOREVER.
When faced with suck a pickle, it can feel overwhelming, and it challenges people to reflect and assess the life they’ve been living up to this point. I am taking it a step further and announcing the 30 Day Challenge. Can you say, “Bucket List Beta Test?” It’s essentially a kick-ass-scavenger-hunt-of-awesome, completed in 30 days. It’ll be a scramble to the very end, and I’m inviting–nay, I’m challenging you to do it with me!
Here are some of the things people want to do before they turn 30:
- Hot air balloon ride
- Backpacking across Europe
- Climb a mountain
- Run a marathon
- Get married
- Get divorced (maybe?)
- Bungee Jump
- Food fight
- Take a road-trip
- Start a business
- Sell that business
- Fall wildly in love
- Heal from a broken heart
- Sing karaoke
- Flowers for no reason (give and receive)
- Buy a car
- Buy a home
- Fly a plane
Look, this list can go on forever. In fact, if you google it, these lists actually do go on forever. I’ve done a LOT of really cool things, and I’m now in the last month of my twenties. It’s time to man the harpoons, because I’m grabbing life by the horns and going for a whale of a good time. How’s that for mixing analogies?
I don’t have the time or money to drop everything and backpack through Europe tomorrow, so that’s out. What I can do is the scary things I’ve thought about, but put off. Well no more!
This challenge is more than just doing things. It’s about experiencing things. Experiencing emotions, thrills, spills, chills, perhaps even ills. It’s all in the name of progress, right? So, readers, I challenge you to follow along. I will send an email reminder every morning to let you know what I’m planning, and invite you to look at how you can do that too. I’ll share my story as I try to knock out all I can in the next 30 days.
There’s a fact of life many of us miss: We’re all going to end up in the record books whether we like it or not. By default, we are recorded as a statistic. If we choose to chase our dreams, stand for what we believe, and push to live deliberately, we can all change how we’re recorded. At the end of your life, are you going to leave a statistic or an impact?
That, my friends, is a damn good question. I am choosing to leave an impression on the world, and right now I’m choosing opportunities that leave a lasting impression on me. Sometimes you have to learn before you teach, right?
What are you choosing?
Leave your comments below!
In a year from now, you’ll wish you started today.
This is one of my most favorite quotes because it keeps me focused on what I’m committing to when I procrastinate. Every time I say no to getting up and getting out there, I’m saying yes to missed opportunities; yes to broken promises to myself; yes to feeling overwhelmed later when I feel like I haven’t gotten anything done; yes to excuses – the list goes on. When I say yes to those things, I’m also saying no to success; no to opportunity; no to connections; and no to myself.
In a year from now, you bet your ass I will wish I had started today. That’s why I’m starting…. today.
My coaching and hypnosis clients have been breaking down their walls, and giving themselves permission to be active participants in their own lives. They’re waking up, getting clear, and consciously creating like I’ve never seen. It’s A-MAY-ZING. Several of them have mentioned things like, “If people only gave themselves the chance to speak to you for a few minutes, they’d realize how powerful this is.” I’m taking that to heart, and I’m offering a beautiful, wonderful, absolutely free opportunity to do just that – get hardcore, goal-oriented, no-fluff coaching to start 2012 off right.
I’m offering year end completion sessions absolutely free for the next two weeks. This offer is only good until the 11th of January. I know what it’s like to make resolutions for the new year and watch them fall apart by March. I know what it’s like to feel like you’re doing the same thing – same victories, same mistakes – year after year. These completion sessions give you a chance to notice the cycle, break it, and create a new pattern for the year.
It’s too good not to give away.
Look, in a year from now, you’ll wish you started today. And it’s free. And you’ve nothing to lose, right? So, what’s stopping you?
Check out the list of the 15 habits for your best year ever, and contact me to schedule your free call with me.
You’ve always wanted this to be the year you finally make it happen, right?
It can be. Let’s make it happen.
Today’s post is a bit of a smack in the face. Well, it might come off as such, so why argue with it, right? I’ve spent the last few weeks watching my clients make incredible leaps of faith – pushing aside the person they’ve spent their lives creating to make room for the one they are becoming. They’re waking up to life, and they’re consciously creating. They are responsible. They are powerful. They are human.
I’ve also spent the last few weeks being inundated with the trials and tribulations of what it is to be the victim. There is a sense of entitlement in the world, and it’s not doing anyone any good. “Oh poor me” isn’t getting you anywhere, and frankly, it’s bullshit.
I hear people talk about how they can’t get what they want because they don’t have A or B or C. They don’t have what it takes because someone took away their X or Y or Z a long time ago. Or worse, they can’t make the changes they want because the economy is bad.
You mean to tell me you can’t change your attitude, create goals and actions plans, or get your ass in gear toward the life you want because the economy is bad?
I asked a friend of mine to describe what the best day of his life looked like. He told me the best day was the one in which he wouldn’t have to work a job he didn’t like. He described a day filled with people being nice to him, and everything he wanted being delivered to him on a silver platter. It sounds nice, right?
The detail often missed in stories like these is in the narrative. Is the subject describing a day in which he goes and gets what he wants, makes executive decisions, takes control, or do great things happen to him?
Here’s the hard truth:
The best day of your life is when you wake up to it and claim it as your own. It’s the day when you take responsibility and choose to stop apologizing, blaming, or being the victim any longer. It’s not good things happening to you – it’s you deciding it’s your life, and God-damn-it you’re going to make good things happen.
Everyone, every moment of every day, is at choice. They (yeah, you included) can either decide to be a leaf in the wind, or the wind itself. Benjamin Disraeli wrote:
“Man is not the creature of circumstance. Circumstance is the creature of man. We are all free agents, and man is more powerful than matter.”
You have a decision to make. Stop the bullshit story and start the story of your life…or don’t.
The greatest day of your life? That’s easy. It’s the day you decide to start living.
Got something to add? Put it in the comments below!
What a treat it was to speak with Kate Swoboda in a Skype interview last week! Kate is the founder and lead coach at Your Courageous Life coaching, and the mastermind behind the Coaching Blueprint – a tool and class to help coaches get their businesses running by helping them get back in touch with what makes them love coaching so much.
If you’ve read anything on her site, you know Kate is a no-nonsense kind of person. She doesn’t sugar coat the issues we are all dealing with – as coaches and as people. She calls out the gremlins we all wrestle with from time to time, and loves playing in that space of uncertainty – that space that many people call fear.
In this interview we talk about what we want for 2012 and beyond, what keeps her inspired to keep inspiring others, and what we, as coaches and human beings, can gain from embracing our fears and discovering what’s within them. It’s a brilliant 20 minutes, if I do say so myself.
I do have to apologize, however. The audio on my microphone just wasn’t playing nicely the day we did this interview, so I have some echo going on. She sounds like she’s in a room (like a regular person). I sound like I’m in a barrel (like someone about to roll over Niagara Falls for publicity). I give you all my word that I will make quite sure to sound better next time.
What do you want to learn from embracing your fear?
What do you want, as we enter the ending months of 2011, for 2012?
Leave your comments for us!
There has been a lot of negative discourse in the world these days – in case you missed it: “the economy is terrible, everything is getting too expensive, you’re not getting any younger, there’s nothing you can do, terrorism is taking over” – it’s all thrown at us every day in the media and sometimes in relationships with those closest to us.
I know, like every last one of you, I’ve found myself in situations that were not the way I’d planned them to be. Whether it’s the unexpected end of a relationship, a surprise visit (from anyone good or not-so-good), failure or falling-short of goals, or financial burdens, when things don’t go as planned it can turn us all upside-down (even if only for a few moments).
So what’s the answer to all of it? What’s the other side of this cursed coin?
There are a lot of little things you can do to shift your game, and level the playing field. They may never prevent the unexpected (it’s called unexpected for a reason), but they’ll definitely help to change the way you influence the world around you, and how it impacts you. Here are some keys for helping you through “what to do when my plans don’t go as planned.”
Tune out the “it’s never gonna get better” voice
The moment things do not go our way, we instinctively begin rattling off all the far-fetched and overly melodramatic details of how “this is just one more terrible thing” in our lives – exaggerating how the situation truly affects us. A previous post of mine [Bad Publicity] talked about this voice a lot. The messages we tell ourselves have a very serious impact on how we view the world.
Ready for a little nostalgia? Remember when you were little and upset about something and your mom told you it would be okay? You believed her! Coincidentally, she was right, wasn’t she? When did you stop believing it would be alright?
When things don’t go as planned, take a moment and listen to that voice in your head. Notice how it makes you feel to believe all the negative and depressing ideas that voice is pushing on you. If you don’t want to feel that way, choose not to believe it. 90% of the time, we blow things out of proportion. The big question is this:
Did my plan get derailed or just delayed?
Take the hint – something is trying to emerge
When what you want seems to elude you, pause for a moment and look around. What appears instead? There’s something trying to emerge in all conflict – which is exactly what happens when plans go awry! I remember working in sales a few years ago, and I found that toward the end of that job it was getting increasingly difficult to smile and stay motivated. The job wasn’t terrible on the surface, but beneath the visible, my heart was crying out for escape. I was not supposed to be there any more.
I know you’ve had moments where you suddenly saw/felt a sign that changed your perspective or brought you clarity. In fact, you may have even asked the sky/God/Universe for a sign. Well, they’re all over the place and it’s high time you gave yourself permission to slow down and see them.
As an example, let’s imagine you’re unemployed and feeling pretty down about it. Maybe you even feel like the victim of the economy. The media is posting record unemployment numbers and it’s all doom-n-gloom well into the future.
Pause. Let’s look around for a moment.
Let’s imagine that other people around you have modified their searches and have found work. Let’s even go as far to say they took risks to get the jobs they now have. What’s this sensation? Maybe the sign here is that changing your plan or taking a risk will deliver the reward you’re looking for. Are you too focused on something that’s not coming? Are you so focused on the tree in front of you that you miss the engulfing wildfire around it?
What’s trying to emerge in your struggle?
Play the Bigger Game & return to the basics
This is probably the most important piece in the equation. When plans fall apart or don’t go as expected, and you feel the weight of it all pushing you off track – discouraging and demotivating you – get back to basics. The Bigger Game is all about knowing who you are and why you do what you do. If you don’t know what it is that makes you come alive, then everything can almost taste the same. If, however, you’ve discovered what you want – what fulfills, thrills, motivates, calms, and creates you – then all you need to do is return to the why behind it.
A perfect example of this is my friend Joe. He works in his garage building custom motorcycles on weekends and most weekday nights (often well into the early morning hours). He also works 40 hours a week in a corporate job pounding phones in a cubicle in the suburbs. When things don’t go as planned, he knows it’s just a delay in his real place in life – building custom bikes.
Joe is so infinitely clear about what makes him feel most alive that he simply doesn’t let anything get in his way. His why is pumping through his veins. Motorcycle building and customizing is Joe’s “Adrenaline of Purpose.” What’s yours?
When it’s as crystal clear what you want as it is with Joe, a calmness comes over you when the unexpected happens. Instead of reacting to the stress, you get curious about it. It no longer threatens your future or happiness. You know what you want and why. That’s the first brick to lay in your foundation.
If you want help discovering what your Adrenaline of Purpose is, contact me. Let’s discover what pumps through your veins.
The Mark Twain quote above is so perfect because we need to stay present to opportunity. Even completely changed or ruined plans can unfold into the most beautiful day in your life. Give it that chance.
What do you find yourself doing/thinking/feeling/behaving when plans don’t go as planned?
Leave your comments below!
P.S. It’s all going to be okay.
This week I want to talk about the “best version of yourself” you can be. Moreover, I want to talk about the meaning of that famous phrase. It’s touted in self-help books and seminars across the globe, but do you really know what it’s all about?
What the phrase means to instruct is that you identify your greatest qualities and accentuate them as often as possible – embody those qualities so you operate from your most powerful or resourceful place.
I want to give a few tools to help you figure out what that means for you, and what you can do today to start living the best version of yourself.
1 – Listen.
No, really, listen. The greatest version of all of us – individually and collectively – listens at a much better level. Many people feel their best when they connect with another person through powerful conversation, or simply being a shoulder to cry on. Do you have a friend you can tell anything to? It feels pretty good to confide in someone and have your voice heard, right? Well, return the favor. Listen to the world around you, and let the voices be heard. You’ll grow more than words can say the day you start truly listening.
2 – Have an open mind.
Close mindedness is a sure-fire way to cut off opportunities, relationships, and great experiences. Open it up… wide!
3 – Ask for what you want.
Truly, one of the most powerful attributes one can possess is the ability to articulate what one wants. When you go to a restaurant you don’t simply stare at the server hoping you get what you want, do you? No, you ask for what you want. Life is no different. Start asking!
4 – Respond instead of React.
This is a big one. Take a moment to pause before reacting to something that you may find upsetting. Instead of jumping into the negativity, discover within yourself whether it matters or not. Many, many people react negatively to situations that don’t matter 30 minutes later. They find themselves all worked up for no reason. When you respond instead of react, you give yourself permission to be in control of your emotions and your circumstances. Try it!
5 – Take on new perspectives.
Try looking at a situation from someone else’s shoes. This is the sister to the “have an open mind” point. Sometimes our chosen perspective causes us to assume things that simply don’t apply. Remember your truth may not be the truth… and not necessarily someone else’s truth.
6 – Ask the future you for advice.
Whenever you feel stuck, ask yourself what the “you” one year from now would say about it. What would 2012 Lauren say to you today? The same can also be said about what advice you’d give yourself if you could speak to the 2010 version of yourself. What piece of advice would you share with the Steve from last year? You will be amazed what comes out of your mouth when you answer a few questions from each perspective.
7 – Connect with giants.
David Ogilvy of Ogilvy & Mather (arguably the largest advertising firm in the world) sends a care package whenever someone new is appointed to run one of their global offices. Inside this package is a Russian Nesting Doll. Inside the innermost doll is a little rolled-up hand-written note. It reads, “if each of us hires people who are bigger than we are, we shall become a company of giants.”
Surround yourself with those that make you feel the greatest. Play in groups of people that are bigger than you – that you can learn from – that encourage you to be the best you can be.
Remember, the best version of yourself has a vision and is driven by purpose. The best version of you knows what he or she is fighting for. If you need help discovering what that might be for you, don’t hesitate to contact me. It’s never too late to discover what makes you happy, and what makes you feel alive!
P.S. Be the best taco you can be!
How do you know you’re living the best version of yourself? Share in the comments below!
Really, it’s that simple.
Before the flood of voices saying, “life isn’t that simple; I can’t do that; Yes, that’s nice, but unrealistic…” come rushing into your mind, take a deep breath and pretend with me. Imagine a world where your personal happiness was most paramount to your prosperity. Visualize a world in which you are rewarded for waking up happy, helping others, and smiling. Really, let that reality come into your space – we’re pretending, remember?
In this make-believe world, you wouldn’t dare waste your time chasing things that bring you down, would you? Hell no, you’d consciously choose what you want to feel and do because you deserve it, and this life is all about what lights you up. What’s it like to feel that important – that the value of your life is qualified in how good it makes you feel?
Hint: it feels awesome.
Now take a deep breath, and prepare to make a choice. Choose to make this reality your reality from now on. Better yet, make it your reality for the next week. No big deal – it’s just a week, right? Many of us have been so inundated with the details and negativity of our daily lives, that we’ve lost sight of what it means to make decisions based on what feels good. I invite you to spend the next 7 days rediscovering the simple formula above.
For the next week, start saying yes to what you want, and no to what you don’t. It’s not as easy as you think… because you think. The trick is to feel what you want to say yes to, and go for it. Each time you feel like saying yes, but you think it will have “too many consequences” you end up saying no to it. What good does that do for you?
Now, I’m not declaring you must all go out and quit your jobs to pursue things that make you happy… but some of you probably should – and hopefully do. See, the simplest answer is usually the correct one. Look above at the formula. Pretty simple, right? Is it correct? Take the next week and try it out – it just might be!
The choice is yours to make, my friends.